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This is MY Mall
May. 31st, 2011 10:32 pmSam and I went out briefly today. A tentative plan was to go to Arby's for some Jamocha shakes and then maybe stop by the grocery store. We ended up stopping off at the mall after Arby's instead (it's practically across the street on Menaul) and then overheated and just went home afterward. It felt hotter in the mall than outside, which is saying something... what with the desert and all. We're not really "mall people." We don't go very often, especially not when we're supposed to, like Christmas time. This time around we thought it would be fun to do some window shopping, and it's nice because we tend to stop off at Auntie Anne's for a pretzel (I LOVE soft pretzels). We did today by the way. *grin* I learned something today though, or at least became more aware of it.
It was funny in a way. I was dressed like I was sixteen. I was the same shell holding a different person in a familiar place. I have this Death Cab for Cutie shirt that I've had since I was sixteen. In addition to that shirt I was wearing my blue jeans and some white sneakers I got at K-Mart (I think). My DCFC shirt is ripped around the collar and has some small holes in the front. It's a wear-and-tear shirt. At this point it'll be a rag, I don't plan on wearing it again. I did at the mall though. We wandered into Hot Topic and it felt really strange. On a surface level there was this hypocrisy thing I was thinking about. Here at the household we tend to snub people who go there, in our own way. Taking it deeper it's really about the value folks put into having bought their shirts and piercings there instead of someplace else. If you're going to buy a band shirt, but it direct and make sure all the money goes to them. Why bother supporting a middle man too? Then there's that attitude of superiority involved with going there, just like there are with a lot of other stores. All too often it's not even about quality, it really is just the name attached to the place you bought it. In any case, I was under that spell when I was in high school. I paid fifteen to twenty bucks for the DCFC shirt, as well as for some GnR shirts and so on. When asked about it, yeah, it did matter to me that I got them at Hot Topic. Those same feelings and thoughts apply to Spencer's Gifts. We went there too. Sam explained to me when I told her about my discomfort about how the major issue with those places is how many of their clientele behave, not so much the place itself. Made sense to me anyway.
Something I noticed though was that my own interests and priorities were changing. The stores I would have visited before were no longer interesting. I avoided the cap stores (hats) the sport stores, and didn't feel comfortable in Hot Topic, etc. Instead I had a good time going through places like Coach House and Hallmark checking out the little trinkets and so forth. That was another weird thing because I'm not sure exactly how to make that mesh with myself. I understand that I've changed quite a bit over the last five years, but it's something else to see it happen quite so suddenly. That's not to say that I haven't been to the mall all this time, I have, but I guess I just haven't paid attention. I don't mean to make more of something than there really is to it. It's not like I'm having an epic identity crisis or anything. I guess it's just that these things seem more important when I'm actually making an effort to change. I'm not proud of who I've been over the last few years and before hand, but I hadn't made a point to be different. Now I can feel like I am.
It was funny in a way. I was dressed like I was sixteen. I was the same shell holding a different person in a familiar place. I have this Death Cab for Cutie shirt that I've had since I was sixteen. In addition to that shirt I was wearing my blue jeans and some white sneakers I got at K-Mart (I think). My DCFC shirt is ripped around the collar and has some small holes in the front. It's a wear-and-tear shirt. At this point it'll be a rag, I don't plan on wearing it again. I did at the mall though. We wandered into Hot Topic and it felt really strange. On a surface level there was this hypocrisy thing I was thinking about. Here at the household we tend to snub people who go there, in our own way. Taking it deeper it's really about the value folks put into having bought their shirts and piercings there instead of someplace else. If you're going to buy a band shirt, but it direct and make sure all the money goes to them. Why bother supporting a middle man too? Then there's that attitude of superiority involved with going there, just like there are with a lot of other stores. All too often it's not even about quality, it really is just the name attached to the place you bought it. In any case, I was under that spell when I was in high school. I paid fifteen to twenty bucks for the DCFC shirt, as well as for some GnR shirts and so on. When asked about it, yeah, it did matter to me that I got them at Hot Topic. Those same feelings and thoughts apply to Spencer's Gifts. We went there too. Sam explained to me when I told her about my discomfort about how the major issue with those places is how many of their clientele behave, not so much the place itself. Made sense to me anyway.
Something I noticed though was that my own interests and priorities were changing. The stores I would have visited before were no longer interesting. I avoided the cap stores (hats) the sport stores, and didn't feel comfortable in Hot Topic, etc. Instead I had a good time going through places like Coach House and Hallmark checking out the little trinkets and so forth. That was another weird thing because I'm not sure exactly how to make that mesh with myself. I understand that I've changed quite a bit over the last five years, but it's something else to see it happen quite so suddenly. That's not to say that I haven't been to the mall all this time, I have, but I guess I just haven't paid attention. I don't mean to make more of something than there really is to it. It's not like I'm having an epic identity crisis or anything. I guess it's just that these things seem more important when I'm actually making an effort to change. I'm not proud of who I've been over the last few years and before hand, but I hadn't made a point to be different. Now I can feel like I am.
